Well, our little mini became an air breather last Friday just after lunch which puts Lillis as the guesser closest--although her guess was a little cheap: 4/3 @ midnight? There are 2 midnights there. Maybe I'll send her half a prize, split the difference :)
I don't know if it was a good idea, but I re-read Genesis 3 before labor and delivery to remind myself what exactly was cursed about women and childbirth. This is what it says:
To the woman he said,
"I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing;
with pain you will give birth to children.
Your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you."
I got the sense that childbirth hurt, but under the curse it was going to hurt a lot more. I think my NASB version said. "multiply your pains." Well, yep. Labor pains hurt. I gotta say that I was looking forward to labor and delivery because I wanted to know if it was as bad as everyone says it is. Having studied martial arts for a long time, I wondered if any of the pain management skills I learned there would transfer over to managing pain in labor. The short answer is yes and no.
I went into labor about 3 in the morning on Friday. We had been waiting day after day beyond the due date and by Thursday I was starting to feel like this was going to happen in the next 24 hrs. My mom happened to have gotten engrossed in playing hearts on her computer and was still up! at that time. I drew myself a bath and kinda dozed and had contractions there for a while, alternating between the tub and my mom's futon. About 5:30 she started timing my contractions since the midwives had said to come in when they were 4-1-1, four minutes apart, for one minute, over an hour--that's 15 contractions an hour. All those years of controlled breathing in martial arts seemed to come in handy and I was basically ok. Around 7 the contractions seemed to be coming every 5 minutes and I woke N to get him in the direction of out the house, I sent a pre-written email to a bunch of folk letting them know we were headed to the hospital, and I called the hospital. But I did so well talking to the midwife through a contraction that she said I was still in early labor and to keep going at home, and to rest when possible. So we didn't go to the hospital then. I ate breakfast and the contractions kept coming. N and my mom took care of me, getting me water, petting me, and taking care of all the details like timing contractions. At some point, heeding the midwife, I decided I would labor in my own bed so I could doze between contractions. This seemed to slow the contractions down so we weren't headed toward 4-1-1 any more. That was fine with me because sleeping was nice and having my husband and mother around was comforting. But at some point, N says around 11, the pain went from managable to managable + 1. I was starting to lose it and I certainly wasn't sleeping between contractions any more. In the background I could hear N and my mother trying to figure out if we had hit the magic 15/hr. However they figured it out, eventually they called the hospital and talked to the midwife again. I don't know if they convinced her that I was ready or if she heard my howling in the background and said I was ready, but either way we were going to the hospital.
At that point, I totally lost it. We were at managable + 10 or managable + infinitiy, i.e. NOT managing the pain, not sure I could make it to the car from the apartment (our apt and car are at opposite ends of a large complex). I had two contractions on the walk from the apt to the car and both times was hoping there wasn't anyone around because I'm sure I was really scary looking. N drove to the hospital and I have no idea what mid-day traffic was like because my eyes were closed the whole way and I was totally freaking out. N says he was really stressed; I would be too if I had this whale sized woman in the seat next to me screaming bloody murder at the top of her lungs every 2 minutes.
Between parking at the hospital and the delivery room I don't have much memory of anything except that the air was cool and I liked that. The next thing I remember was a nurse holding my hands and saying, "If you don't get control you won't be able to give birth naturally." I interpretted this as, "We will pump you full of drugs if you don't calm down." That scared the crap out of me, but I also had this little thought, "She thinks I can get control. That is novel. Maybe I should try." So I tried and they seemed happy with me just not screaming. So I guess that's what "control" is; I still felt pretty out of control. Somewhere in there, I got on a bed, and somewhere in there they said, "You can push now." Yea, well I had been pushing so no big diff there. Apparently, I was already fully dilated when I arrived at the hospital, but no one knew. Various people said stuff to me that was encouraging, but there were only two things on my mind, 1) Why doesn't this woman who is making me sign consent forms between contractions have a clipboard? This would be so much easier if she had a freekin clipboard. 2) I hope this kid comes soon cuz this pushing seems to have no effect.
And then all of a sudden our little girl was there. They put her on my chest, but i couldn't see her because she was inside my focal range. There was a ton of buzz around the room, but I was pretty out of it. They weren't happy with the way the mini was crying so they took her away to another station and N went with her. In the out of it state, I was thinking, "I'd like to see her so we can name her. What does she look like?" I don't have much of a memory of the first hour of the mini's life, just a lot of buzz, and I was happy that the pushing was done and the pain was done.
The mini's middle name is Chinese as I mentioned earlier and means to praise God's grace. We have a ton to be thankful for--
I am thankful for having both my husband and my mom with me at home for 90% of the process. That was a real treat. We were in the delivery room for only 45 minutes before the mini popped out. Aside from a crazy car ride and having to consent to stuff under duress, 45 minutes is way better than 12+ hrs which is how long the midwife says she is usually with laboring mothers.
About that car ride: now knowing I was fully dilated at the time, we're pretty happy the mini didn't get bounced out in traffic.
The mini is a happy healthy little girl. She's a bit on the wee side, just under 6 lbs, but she's feeding well and we look forward to baby sausage legs eventually.
My recovery: It's been going really well. I do have to remind myself to take it easy, but I'm reminded everytime I get out of a chair and my butt is sore. Plus I have my mom who is cooking awesomeness for me to eat. YAY YAY YAY.
The proud papa: Before the mini, I did the cooking and N did the cleaning. After the mini, well habits continue. I do the cooking (feeding), and N does the cleaning (for the most part). This little girl has a great dad.
So yea, we're a little sleep deprived and kinda out of it, but we're amazed by the graces around us. Thanks everyone for the warm well-wishes.
If you'd like to see photos, send me an email or message me through xanga.
Comments (5)
Yea! I'm SO glad she didn't bounce out in traffic too! That would have made for a scarier (and messier) story. So if she was born at noon on the third ... does it actually matter which midnight you use?
Meeting her and seeing you this summer will be prize enough for me.
Love you!
I LOVE this post.... hee, thanks for sharing. and N and mom are awesome. i can't wait to meet her.
oh!! congrats again, bb! My legal training is nudging me to say that consent under duress would be questionable, to say in the least...but I can see why she was trying to get you to sign. fascinating to read the account from your perspective. thanks for sharing and congrats congrats congrats!
D told me yesterday, 'you should read this entry' and I'm glad I did. so nice to get a detailed account. you always wonder what's going through someone's head. when I was on the L&D floor I used to go around asking laboring women that, before getting the very strong hint that I should keep out of their way. one woman said it felt like a train running her over which has scared me ever since. I suppose it's hard to describe. Keep writing!
I don't know how this post slipped past me, but I'm glad I finally noticed it in my inbox. It brought back memories of our own childbirth experiences. It's such a good thing you did most of your labor at home, because laboring at the hospital as we did the first time around was nightmarish. We're thinking about you guys and praying for you. A big congratulations to you both!!